things that are difficult to say when you’re drunk

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative

2. Preliminary

3. Proliferation

4. Cinnamon

 THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULTTO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity

2. Anti-constitutionalistically

3. Passive-aggressive disorder

4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I’m married.

2. Nope, no more booze for me!

3.Sorry, but you’re not really my type.

4. Kebab? No thanks, I’m not hungry.

5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?

6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.

7. I’m not interested in fighting you.

8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool!

9. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

Harbour Brewing Co

Harbour Brewing Co

The Harbour Brewing Co was started in 2011 by Bretheyr Rhys Powell and Eddie Lofthouse who share a passion for beer and surfing, both with the dream of opening their own brewery. Rhys had taken steps to make his dream a reality studying Brewing and Distilling at Heriot Watt University in Edinburgh, and having taken a position as a brewer at Sharps Brewery in Rock, North Cornwall. Eddie had been running the family business, The Atlantic Hotel and Doom Bar in New Polzeath, Cornwall, for a number of years. The Hotel and bar closed in early 2011 and is due to be rebuilt as a new hotel, apartment, restaurant and bar complex. This provided a perfect time to make a career change.

Harbour Brewing Company Eddie and Rhys

In early 2011, they decided to take the dream a little further. they met in a pub in Padstow and decided they would open a brewery.  The first thing they did was celebrate by drinking a few beers and deciding a name. It seemed a good idea to name ourselves after the place the idea was conceived, and Harbour Brewing Company was born. Starting from scratch, the opportunity was there to install a brewery system with the versatility to allow the brewing to be as creative as possible. Eddie found a 10 British Brewers Barrel (bbl) system designed in California, and built in Hungary, by the American firm Bavarian Brewing Technologies.

About Harbour Brewing Company

Harbour Brewing Company is a small craft brewery based in North Cornwall. they are committed to making beers that are contemporary and deliver an uncompromising taste experience. they use pure Cornish spring water sourced on the hillside next to the brewery, and only the finest raw materials. they believe this is the only way to deliver a premium quality product.

they apply a progressive and innovative approach in both beer style and brewing technique, whist honoring traditional and proven methods. Using this approach they aim to produce a range of full flavoured, balanced and creative beers.

read more about Harbour Brewing Co here on Beer Reviews, and if you want to buy Harbour brewing beers, they’re here at Beermerchants.com

Chimay & Beers

Chimay

Chimay Brewery (“Bières de Chimay”) is a beer brewery and monastery in Chimay, southern Hainaut, Belgium.

The brewery is located in the Scourmont Abbey, a Trappist monastery, and is one of the seven breweries worldwide that produce Trappist beer. They make three widely distributed ales: Chimay Rouge, Chimay Bleue, and Chimay Blanche.

Chimay is an authentic Trappist beer. That means that it is brewed within the walls of a Trappist monastery under the control and responsibility of the community of monks, and whose revenue is devoted to social service.

buy Chimay Beers here

Jever

Jever – Friesisches Brauhaus zu Jever

Jever is a German beer brand, named after the town of Jever where it is brewed. It has been brewed by the “Friesisches Brauhaus zu Jever” (the Jever Frisian Brewery) since 1848.

Reknowned for their hoppy-dry herbacious lager. This is a lager to savour.

buy Jever Pilsener here

in stock – out of stock…

Just a quick Friday blog post come tell me what you want…

We now have stock control on the site, so, if a product is out of stock, it says “Out of Stock”; if there is 5 or less left, the site shows there are less than 5 bottles left.   Like wise, if we get something rare and special in, we can limit or even discount for 6 bottles, through to 24 or more…

Now what I can do, is set the site to hide a product whilst it’s out of stock?       Would you like that?   But, then, that stops the chance of registering for an announcement email when it’s back in stock… also stops the chance that people searching for the product on google, or on the site and their chance of discovery…

I can of course hide products/breweries manually – like Alesmith – which I doubt we shall be having again… (but fingers crossed, we’ll see it again). But, then do I just turn off the beer, rather than the brewery, since it’s interesting to read about the breweries we have/had?

So, I am throwing it open to you all dear Twitter, Facebook and hooman friends to help me with a “policy”, whilst we look at a technological solution, allowing you to browse only in-stock products…

comments, solutions and thoughts welcome below…

Camden Town Brewery

Camden Town BreweryCamden Town Brewery.

London now has it’s very own craft beer and as the name suggests, it’s being brewed in Camden. Using only the freshest ingredients and no brain aching chemicals, Camden Town Brewery have been making beer beneath railway arches in Camden since 2010. Inspired by the great beers of Germany and America, they make a lager, wheat beer and US-style pale ale, plus a hoppy nitro stout, called Camden Ink. Watch out for regular single-release beers. The best city in the world deserves the best beer and now it’s right here.

buy Camden Town Brewery Beers here

New Beermerchants.com site.

We are proud to announce the launch of our new website. We feel we have radically improved the layout, design and functionality of this new website with many new features! This will be the first time you’ll see the all new Beermerchants.com site.

Built from the ground up, the third incarnation of Beermerchants.com, We’ve gone out and put it all your suggestions in place with the new site.  It’s been a long, big job.   We really wanted to bring something special to the online beer retail world, I really hope you’ll appreciate what we have acheived.    Something simple, clean and easy to find the beers you want, and might like.

Here’s a few new things that I think you’ll appreciate.

NEW THINGS

We think the best thing is that you can browse by the breweries like Huyghe Brewery, Kernel Brewery and Fruli and more… you can find beers by style and by country at the click of one little icon.

You can now: Add to your wishlist, Review every beer, Buy Cider, Buy Genever, Buy Mixed Cases, Bottled Beers, many many different Beer Glasses for every occasion. View more than 300 products per page, quick search and many more little features.. with more to come…

IN STOCK? OUT OF STOCK? – Now, it’s always fatal to make promises, especially when it comes to technology – but, the new system has full stock control, so if it’s there, available and not saying “out of stock”, it should be there!

WISHLISTS? You can now add all the great beers to a wishlist! Yes, just like Amazon, so you don’t have to keep it in your cart! If you do like to add things to your cart and come back, they have a five day “shelf life”… so you have 5 days to grab what you want!

ALL THE GOOD BITS – Be assured, all the good bits are still there: the favourite Mixed Cases, all the classic Belgian beers, Trappist Beers, but now with a range of awesome German brews and many great beers from the rest of the world! All delivered straight to your door for you to enjoy in the comfort of your own home, by our normal couriers.

BEER GLASSES – We have added more Glassware! You’ll find a whole load of new shapes, styles and even some older ones that are oh so collectible.

BEER GIFTS – We have extended the range of Gifts slightly into: Gift cases, Soaps, Books and more coming, under the heading “Gifts”.

Registering is even easier on the new site, but you’ll have to re-register on the new site, but it’s now even easier. If you want more info – click here.

We sincerely hope you like it!

New beers are very much easier to add to the site now as well as bring technology improvements over time, we really have to work constantly keeping the site fresh and always offering something new. We sincerely hope you enjoy your time on the new site and we cant wait to grow and improve it further through 2012.

Thanks for reading! Use Twitter? Say hi, @beermerchants. Use facebook to kill time at work? Yes, we’re on there too…Facebook.com/Beermerchants

beer: a cure for the common cold

I bloody hate colds.   I know, in reality, not many people do, but I really hate being ill.

So, here’s my thinking,  Beer is the cure for the common cold.   Why? Because, if you’re like me, being offered Paracetamol and caffiene laced juice with more sacharine in them than nasty pop – leaving you with a mouth that makes you want to talk like those damn Meerkats.

What to cure yourself with?    Sitting here, drinking poke-your-eye-out hoppy IPA‘s really do hit the spot.   Not so much that you might normally recoil at the hoppiness, but I can actually taste them.   Washing down IPA’s with Jewish chicken soup, is a great combo.   I think IPA’s when you’re ikky, can rejuvenate you back to a state of health equivalent to Ron Jeremy in his prime.

Ok, so what if it’s not the actual cure,  for man-flu?   Who cares?     Watching child-hood reruns on Gold, a spot of Rugby and a bit of footie and some cricket, a case of IPA’s and a do not move order, on the eve of heavy snow fall, doesn’t suck.

have you got any beer-y excuse days?

Education and Beer – Learn and Share

Education

I was out delivering a talk recently, on beer; you know the usual stuff: how beer is made, how long it’s been made, what makes it “beer” and a loose intro to beer styles and the differences between.

I really love getting out and about, meeting all sorts of people – and thankfully that lovely phrase crosses over, Different Strokes for Different Folks. I am sure some of you have serious qualifications in your chosen career or prior career before you fell into Beer, so you might have the insight in to what a Stroke is. Well, I can start by saying it’s not the brain injury we’re talking about. It’s what some have referred to as an approach to different people that should be individualized. The proverb also means that different people have different tastes. Nobody knows exactly where the saying comes from. Wolfgang Mieder thinks it originated in the United States.

Anyway, why all the psycho-philosopy… well, I think it’s important that we understand where we stand in the world of beer. I think EVERYONE who has a personal or professional interest in beer has an obligation to help those who don’t know about beer, but with the caveat that we mustn’t judge people by their tastes, by what they drink or otherwise.

My toughest tasting from memory, was a bunch of bankers (I have used other terms) certified Industrial Fizzy Lager drinkers, and proud of it. Did I berate them for doing so… no. Did I find an angle with them, exploring their other food intake to seek parallel toward drinking better beer… yes. I had to work very hard on these chaps, one by one, they slowly came around to thinking that perhaps they could do better – and I learned something: their motivations weren’t flavour or the like – it was getting where they wanted to be, in a controlled amount of time – hence drinking Weak Industrial Fizzy Lager. Also, Price was a factor – these better off, financially, people were hung up on the price of Artisan Lager vs Industrial Lager. They also came with the mindset of Last Man Standing – a game of dare to who falls over first; a challenge if there ever was one from my stand point.

The funny thing, even with all the bravado and bullshit spouting forth, once I had done my gig a few of them were keen to talk to me at the bar. Why? I think it was, so not to be under the gaze of the group bullies. What did they ask? Great questions about the history, locale and what does X beer drink well with on the table; not the how much, how much and how much they were involved with when in the formal presentation.

There was my chance to grab a couple from the heard and change their ideals toward the fuller flavoured smaller brewery brewed beers; why beers were sour, why there are 10%+ abv beers etc.

I am in a fortunate position to be able to travel and learn about beer, many people can’t. Relying on friends and mates down the pub – maybe they were bought a box of beers for Christmas, maybe they have a of a 1000 beers to drink before you end up in a wooden box. There are all tiers of tastes, levels of awareness toward beer.

This is where you come in.

I want you to go out, learn as much as you can about beer, learn from those who write, talk and video blog about Beer, and take it to those that aren’t beer-aware. Er, that really sounds like taking a faith to the uninitiated; so you don’t want to sound like a missionary. Ok, how about disruption: Getting out there and flyering for your next local beer festival. Invite all your friends on Facebook, email them. Become an advocate for your good local brewery! Having a party? Take some good, but accessible beers – if no one drinks them, so what!? You’ll have something good to drink all night. Instead of Alcopops try some fruit beers.

It’s all well and good having 1000′s of followers on Twitter, and they’re all beer people, all the people you socialise with are beer people etc… But, I make a concerted effort on corrupting my Fishing and every day mates ideals toward beer – even my gluten intolerant mate who had resorted to cider and corona (his words; they kinda taste the same) to Mongozo GF Pils, “it actually tastes like a lager”.

Why do I say this?

Well, if you as a beer lover, on my Beermerchants twitter numbers, say 3000 people – turn one of your friends onto artisan beer, or just beer (away from wines or ciders – or god forbid Alcopops – a double word score) you immediately double the numbers of people who might buy or the chance that people may find the beers we love.

I am not talking about Militancy – ok, “Occupy The Pub” or “Occupy Supermarket Isles” sounds great, just a gentle nudge here and there. Take a friend to a beer festival – much like Teach a Friend to Homebrew.

Remember – No one likes a Know it all.

Why can’t this be done via marketing or advertising:  You have the trust, you know these people, you know what they want, like and their tastes.  You know their social schedules and you speak to them when they are either making a choice at the bar or in the supermarket isle.   You can of course, should you so wish to, help them with recomendations from Beermerchants.com.   You can hit that totally indivualised experience for the newby beer lover.   Do it!  Tell them, This is why I love beer.

Go for it!

I would love to see this taken on… not in some sort “you must” – just a little softly softly approach. I am sure many of you do anyway.